In the span of ten minutes, I had six missed calls from Chilito.
Usually, this means someone is either dead, pregnant or arrested.
PVW “Chilito, SLOW DOWN, You what?”
Chilito “ComeToTheOffice. RIGHTNOW! YouAren’tGoingToBelieveThis.”
PVW “What is it?”
Chilito “HURRY UP. You won’t believe it. I have to show you.”
I walked into the office and found him looking at an ad on Craigslist.
It was so seductive, no straight man could resist.
My emotions were everywhere.
The opportunities were endless.
For just $700 I could be the proud owner of:
La Bamba del Fuego (LBDF for Short)
Mania set in.
A minute later, I was on the phone with the owner.
Negotiating terms and conditions and getting the price cut in half.
I would have gone lower, but the InvestmentTeam had ethical issues with paying less for something with such potential.
The next step was procurement.
The InvestmentTeam was skeptical about purchasing a vehicle that needed 24-volts to jump, had no seats and required vice grips to turn the ignition.
PDub finally sprinkled in a little old negro wisdom.
PDub “Guys, we are supposed to regret this decision AFTER we make it.”
InvestmentTeam in unison “I’m in”
Everything after the purchase got hazy.
The Fuego took hold.
By the time I mustered the psychic energy to extract myself from the situation….
It was too late.
The damage was done.
In red spray paint, an investor had rudely written “Fuck the Pope” on LBDF’s roof.
My half acre of grass was decimated into a perfectly spun donut.
Thirty construction cones, that lined, what used to be an obstacle course, were now lying on their backs and La Bamba del Fuego was missing a right front tire.
Before LBDF: After LBDF
After extensive treatment, she still remains in my front yard.
For just ten cents a day LBDF will be back to spinning donuts in no time.
To make a donation or become an investor in the Wounded LBDF Fund please contact members of the LBDF Board:
Paul Wilson- Silent Partner
Isaac Wilson- Key Grip
Jerry Colombini- Senor Limpio
Vic Rigas- Principal
Pedro Craig-Vice Grip
Nick D- Honorary Member/Mechanic